My volunteer story

Another day of Crisis service has ended. Again, it was tiring, but you got to come home full of satisfaction, knowing that just some little things you did, meant so much to the homeless.

I always wanted to take up some voluntary work to help the community, also to build up my soul while contributing something to those who needed help. At the beginning of the month, I read about this exclusive christmas service from the church and thought this would be a good opportunity for me to get involved in. Without much hesitation, I signed up on the website and I was assigned to help at the Rough Sleepers Centre.

Things turned up well on the first day, but with a little struggling moment this morning, I still ended up going to the centre and volunteer my time & work. I would say I had a very very very different experience from what I gained on the first day.

1. Standing outside Tesco (a super-market) beside the Rough Sleeper Centre with 3 other volunteers for 2 hours and almost froze to death.
Job description: Avoid the 'guests' of the centre from shoplifting (I thought Tesco should have more specialised guard??)

2. Spent an hour in the Pet Zone (a special service for the guest's pet, including veterinary)
Job description: To keep the dogs accompanied?? Again, I was froze to death and it was kind of boring cause the dogs were sleeping most of the time.
(There was a guest who has actually got 5 dogs! I wonder if he is spending all his money on his dogs which eventually made him homeless)

3. Spending don't know how many hours standing at the gap with a weird lady. (the only indoor job for today)
Job description: Basically just stand there and smile to people who passed by.

And there was this black guy(a rough sleeper) approaching me saying my scarf looks nice!

He actually asked if he could take a closer look at it and I agreed. I passed him my scarf and he smelled it, then showed that (after having drugs) kind of smile or grin or whatever silly look it was.
He then asked, "Can I have it?" (with a little bit of desperate look, but still lack of sincerity)

Seriously what would you do if a rough sleeper ask you things like that?????

"..oh we-eee-ll, .. .. .. yeah, you can have it, if you really like it. you know, it keeps you warm and,... yeah.. take it" (deep inside me, my heart was bleeding)

"REALLY?"

"Yes.. (now please just go before I change my mind) (my heart still bleeding) "

He left, without saying thank you, without having this supposedly happy look. The worst is, he had already got a scarf on him.. And I still said YES??? I supposed he didn't really need my scarf?

Deep in my heart, I was very upset, it was my favourite scarf. I got it from my aunt as a gift and I only had it for 3 days and it had only been on my shoulder for twice.
I told my sister, she said I was toooo kind? (I don't think I am)
I told my aunt, she went "What?? I went to find it from the store for you, and there was only one left!"
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After hours and hours of self-counselling, I comforted my erratic heart.
- not only those who look like needs help, needs help.
- if you really want to help someone, would you give up something that you like so much which could possibly help other people?? It was just a scarf, what if it's your favourite jacket? shirt? or even money??? My answer to that is I don't know. I want to help, but I think I have limitation.

All I could say right now is goodbye, my 2-day old scarf.

Do you still want to volunteer?
Yes.